Okay, here's the deal. Let's talk for a minute about the term "twisted sense of humor." Some of you out there might call it a curse. I consider it a true gift. Why? Because it helps, folks, plain and simple. It helps to be able to laugh at the utter absurdity of life. Sure, my sense of humor catches me a lot of grief. Laughing at inappropriate times is a god-awful embarrassment, but it also releases a lot of tension that most folks just keep bundled up. Me, hey, I've been known to laugh at a funeral on Sunday morning, Christmas Day. It was not my fault, and certainly not poor Miss Ida Thrower's fault. Miss Ida was the unwilling guest of honor for the gathering, and I was pretty sure this was not how she planned to spend Christmas Day. But, let's just say, in my medical opinion, a 97-year-old woman shouldn't be chopping firewood in 23-degree weather.
Anyway, we were all standing out in the elements, freezing our collective keister off, and one of Miss Ida's great-grandkids was a little anxious to get home to see what Santa had left for him. Then, as if by magic, he noticed Miss Ida's casket, all dressed up with flowers and such. I heard him whisper to his mother, "Are we giving Granny Ida as a present to God?"
Sweet thought, right? His Momma thought so, too... She said, "Yes, Billy...."
Billy thought about that for a minute and yelled out, "Granny Ida! Don't worry! As big as that box is, you know you'll get opened first!"
Well, I lost it. So did several others, including Billy's daddy Burl, who wasn't real happy to be where he was either, semi-frozen to a metal folding chair in the middle of Sainted Heart Cemetery.
Irreverence is fine, as long as you're dedicated to laughing at the absurd things in life. That's why I love South Park, the TV series. Nothing is too sacred for Matt Stone and Trey Parker, and I like that. And, when I heard they had gotten the green light for a full-length movie, I could only begin laughing, because, without the limitations of network censorship, I knew they'd go completely wild. And, folks, they did.... And it is worth every blasted second. South Park: Bigger, Longer, and Uncut is about as funny as you can get without positively choking to death.
You want a simple plot for a movie? The South Park kids, otherwise known as Kyle, Stan, Cartman, and Kenny, are forced to sneak into an obscenity-filled Canadian movie starring their favorite TV stars Terrence and Phillip. Terrence and Phillip are world-over for their, uh, flatulence humor. Well, this movie-within-a-movie is all fart jokes, and is full of the rudest words you've ever imagined, and a few you may not have thought to combine yet.
Well, the kids go to school, armed to the teeth with these newfound words, and teach their classmates just how to curse like Terrence and Phillip. And the town goes crazy. Parents go nuts! And, well, war breaks out. An actual war. And, yes, Kenny gets killed...like you knew he would. But this time he goes to Hell, and finds himself giving sexual advice to a newly sensitive Satan, and his sexually aggressive boyfriend Saddam Hussein. We also get to see Heaven, full of big-breasted naked angels (and, for fans of the TV show, Big Gay Al gets to do a full-frontal nude scene, too.)
Look, folks, if you're going to this movie expecting cutting-edge dry humor and a few chuckles, forget it. Parker and Stone are about as subtle as rubbing turpentine in a bullet wound. But, what these guys do know is satire, and they pull no punches whatsoever at their targets. The plot is just an excuse to mock the current political trend of blaming Hollywood for every bad thing going on in the world. But they aren't satisfied to stop there. Their gleeful cruelty aims all guns at everyone from Winona Ryder to the Baldwin Brothers, and from Brooke Shields to the Arquette family. I mean, when the Hell they draw is populated with Adolph Hitler and George Burns, you know these guys could care less that they offend.
But, in a truly hysterical piece of news that I know was in Stone and Parker's plan from the get-go, the MPAA, the governing body of Moviedom that rates movies for audience appropriateness, refused to give South Park an "R" rating until they cut two minutes out of it. One can only imagine what they had to cut out, because what's left over is raunchy, vulgar, and funny as hell.
In the words of South Parkian kid Stan, though, "This is about more than fart jokes." And it is. Whether they meant to or not, Parker and Stone have made a movie that just about covers everything worth spoofing about this last decade of the century. No, this thing is not going to be some classic of film history, nor is it going to be some animated miracle, but it should be stored away somewhere, if only to show people in the future just how stunted the decade has been. Political correctness, reverential treatment of movie stars, militant groups, political-action groups, stupid laws, the lack of parental concern, and religious right-wingers who interpret Scripture for whatever purpose they feel. Everyone's about crazy, and Parker and Stone see it, and make fun of it all. It just so happens that, in doing so, they make the absurdity even funnier. Maybe Jimmy Buffett said it best when he wrote, "If we weren't all crazy, we would all go insane."
Plain and simple, friends and neighbors, this is an extremely funny movie, and, if you're able to see the humor in everyday life, it will be even funnier. This movie has only been out about 48 hours now, and I can already see the political flags unfurling, condemning this movie as the prime example of why kids act the way they do. I can see Jerry Falwell practically frothing at the mouth, waiting to make a speech. I mean, if Tinky-Winky the Teletubby can cause so much stink because he has a triangle on his head and carries a purse, this movie will send the Wrong Reverend Falwell into shivering fits! I can see letters to the editor in every paper from sea to shining sea, blasting this as pure evil (not Dr. Evil, but Pure Evil, his cousin from Colorado.) But, what it boils down to is this -- most everyone that would blast it would never go see it to begin with. The more fuss they raise, the longer it will be talked about, and the more people will go see it. You ever think that might just have been part of the plan from the start? Hmmmmmm.
People, it's a holiday weekend. Have your cookouts. Light your fireworks. Fly your flag. Celebrate the freedom as documented in the Declaration of Independence. And, should you get a mood to get some cinematic jollies, go see South Park: Bigger, Longer, and Uncut. Image copyright Paramount Pictures. |
medical miracle