Okay, here's the deal. You can't shock me. I've got what they call a "thick skin." I'm guessing that's why I've fared so well as a physician -- I mean, we doctors have to inspect stool samples for a living, for chrissakes. That's why I've always had a hard time understanding why folks lose their cogs when the name Howard Stern is mentioned. Sure, he skirts the boundaries of the FCC rule book, and he's apt to prompt a kiss from a lesbian now and then on "Late Night" television, but to my standards he's just about...well, standard. I mean, he's not a serial killer who eats his victims, he doesn't pressure old ladies into sending him their life savings in the name of God, and he doesn't make bad covers of classic soul tunes and pretend to be talented. Those are the folks who I find shocking.

What makes Howard Stern so notable, in my book, is that he's a smart, talented, and funny personality. (Though I won't say he ain't ugly.) The thing that Howard does that really gets folks steamed, is that he's honest. He will say without censorship what's on his mind, and provoke others around him into doing the same thing. And for a lot of folks in our politically correct world, that's way out of bounds. These days, no matter what you say, somebody is gonna be offended by it. You could go into McDonald's and order a super-size fries and get backlash from The Squash Council of America, upset that you're consuming potatoes instead of their preferred veggie. Not to mention the Society Against Size-ism, the Association of Fine Diners, and the Granddaughters of the Burger King.

Anyway, I digress. What I'm here to say is that Howard Stern has a new movie out, Private Parts, and it's quite a rompin' stompin' good time. The film is a loose adaptation of Stern's autobiography, and focuses on the dysfunctional development, married life, and career tribulations of the self-styled King of All Media during his rise to fame and fortune. It's a typical rags-to-riches storyline, in the tradition of most bio-pics, but with significantly more laughs and nudity than, say, Ghandi.

I knew the film would be funny, but what surprised me is that the soft side of Howard comes through in such a revealing way. The heart of the story is in his relationship with his wife Allison (played wonderfully by "Murder One's" Mary McCormack). Through this plotline we get to see Howard as a devoted family man, who owes his success to a supportive, storm-weathering better half. We're also shown his love and loyalty for cohorts Robin Quivers, the earnest newswoman who encouraged Stern's earliest antics, and sideman Fred Norris, whose stoic presence is fodder for some of the film's best bits.

Private Parts provides a steady stream of laughs, though none of the out-and-out guffaws we're apt to get from his more spontaneous radio shows. The best stuff comes when we're watching Howard the Loser trying to break into college radio and suffering through no-budget first jobs as a small-time disc jockey. We also see some great moments in the censorship battle between Stern and his WNBC watchdog, Kenny, played to the spittin' dervish hilt by Paul Giamatti. The plot plays fast and loose with actual history (at least the history detailed in Stern's writings), but adapting reality is standard procedure in making a good read into a good watch.

I will heartily recommend Private Parts, though it does have its flaws. It seems to end abruptly, and director Betty Thomas struggles to find a stylistic backbone for the film. We get straight narrative, we get flashbacks, we get first person voice-over, we get op-ed style appearances from friends and cohorts. Thomas and producer Ivan Reitman know how to make a mainstream comedy, and in plying their strengths, they softened the edge on Stern's more outrageous tendencies. Conventional wisdom says that the mass movie-going public won't turn out to see something truly shocking and revolting. (But, of course, that's been said about radio too, and we all know where that's taken Stern.) I guess I'll concede that if Howard's gonna break out as a major motion picture star, he can't afford to have his films blacklisted by the religious right before he's even revved his engine good.

I'm sure the film will offend some thin-skinned viewers, but I believe there's enough of an audience out there for this movie to succeed. After digging Howard Stern on the big screen, the only thing that would shock me now is if Private Parts doesn't turn out to be a major hit.