Okay, here's the deal. If I have to explain to you why I respected Stanley Kubrick as a filmmaker, you've never seen a Kubrick film. The man lived for the detail. Some called him "eccentric," others out and out "crazy," but, whatever adjective you want to use, his films were always incredible to watch. And, more often than not, you waited for a Kubrick film like a kid waiting for Santa Claus. Okay, so you waited half a decade or more, rather than a year, but you get what I mean.
And, for his last film, he had the world talking for two years. Almost from the very day Tom Cruise and Nicole Kidman were signed, everyone went nuts. Cruise and Kidman with Kubrick? Sure wouldn't be a tour of Disney World. And, the the words "sex" and "kinky" got tossed into the mix. Sexy couple, director with a wonderful camera sense, and a kinky sex story? Hey, sign me up!!!
And, BOOM! The walls went up. The secrecy started. The whole project was surrounded with more security than a missile silo at Defcon 2. There were rumors after rumors after rumors. Actors were hired and fired. Others were mentioned. A year passed. More stories. More rumors. More actors came and went. Suddenly, another year passed, and we still hadn't seen Frame One of footage. At long last, in the spring, we caught a teaser of very sexy proportions.
Then, suddenly, Kubrick died. And nobody knew if we'd ever see the finished product of his last film.
Well, folks, we got it. And, while it suffers the inevitable fate of not being able to live up to the rumors and the hype, what we did get was pure Stanley Kubrick, with a few notable exceptions.
Eyes Wide Shut stars Tom and Nicole as Dr. Bill and Alice Harford, a married couple living in the heart of big-buck Manhattan society. At an oh-so-posh to-do one night, some Hungarian guy tries to seduce Alice with some cheesy come-ons. At the same party, Bill catches a pass from two women, but gets pulled away by the host Victor (Sydney Pollack) who needs a doctor to quietly aid an OD'ed hooker in the bathroom.
The next night, Bill and Alice get a little rocked on some Mexican Bluegrass and start discussing sexual fantasies. Alice tells Bill about a fantasy she had about some young Navy man she saw on a summer trip to Cape Cod. Bill don't take this news too well, and the two go to scrappin'. Bill walks out. As he wanders the streets, he begins his odyssey through KinkyLand.
The rest of the film is a voyage through decadence, with Cruise acting as the silent guide. We follow him through the night, meeting a host of characters, all of whom have sex as their driving force. Desk clerks, waitresses, costume shop owners, everyone has a kink of their own to share, with Cruise being the observer, the Wanderer through this Inferno.
Bill's wanderings take him through the city and eventually to a country estate where he finds a party like no other. In short, it's less of a party and more of an old-fashioned orgy. Sex of every sort is everywhere around him, and he sees all. The person overseeing this festival of flesh is a masked figure we never get a good look at, and another masked person, a female, warns Bill that he is in danger.
I leave the denouement to you people...why spoil an ending?
Folks, this is not your father's Oldsmobile. This flesh and fantasy mix is nothing people were expecting. It is not a high-dollar skin flick, despite what the rumor mill wanted it to be. Instead, it is a tour of the underworld of sex. Not a sleazy, trashy 8mm version, but an almost artistic homage to the act itself. Kubrick lingers through every camera angle, catching every nod and wink and smile for surface value, and, as always, leaving the camera staring for an additional moment to add a second implication.
Cruise is this movie's star, too. I know Darling Nic is top-billed, too, but she's almost an afterthought in the whole scope of things. If anything, she acts as the impetus and inspiration for his sexual journey. Sort of a Kung Fu thing, but with Caine as a real horny doctor.
And the supporting cast is, as always in a Kubrick effort, a mixed bag of delights. There are two standouts here -- Vinessa Shaw (Hocus Pocus) and Rade Sherbedgia (Mighty Joe Young). Shaw plays a hooker who Bill picks up during his quest, and, in a twist, she gives him his most meaningful experience of the night. Frankly, Shaw is great. Sherbedgia has a quick part as a costume dealer that is at the same time humorous and downright unsettling, as he seems to be actively pimping his own daughter while he's renting costumes. Kubrick always had a way of finding the perfect personality to match his visions, especially in supporting roles. Witness Vincent D' onofrio in Full Metal Jacket, Barry Nelson in The Shining, or Patrick Magee in A Clockwork Orange, just to name a few.
If there's a downside to this, it is in the absolutely outrageous censorship that somehow found its way into the orgy scene. I don't know who, and I don't know how, but someone decided that the film needed a bit of repainting, as it were. So, in the midst of the scene at the orgy, we suddenly get a flashback to the original Austin Powers. Some Studio Bonehead chose to digitally alter parts of the scene to make it less "dirty." All sorts of digitally created stuff pans into view to block body parts and such. The result is a disastrous version of the very funny scene in Powers where things are conveniently moved into view just in time to block shots of private parts. Balloons move in front of some things, melons in front of others. In Powers it was done as a point of humor, and done well. Here, though, it did only one thing -- it brought ill-timed laughter to scenes that should've been quiet, ruining the whole effect of the scene, and, I'm sure, Kubrick's intentions. I don't care how polished the technique is, it was unnecessary.
Without going into a major soapbox sermon, folks, this was probably the most offensive thing they could've done, both to Kubrick's memory, and to the audience. If a studio has such little respect for a director or an audience, there is only one thing to do in response. Never treat another release from that studio with the respect it claims to deserve. No other country got the same censorship treatment. Only U.S. prints were done in such a fashion. In the future, studio chumps, feel free to let me use my own judgement in what I see and don't see. If you fear the MPAA so much, police yourselves better, don't inflict your own answers on a dead man's work. Stanley didn't ask for your help, so don't offer it. Jackasses....
Folks, Kubrick's final work, Eyes Wide Shut, is worth seeing. Nope, it's not perfect, but it's an almost-hypnotic pilgrimage through the world of erotic fantasy. The sleight-of-hand tricks aside, it is a must for viewing, if only to remember one last time what we lost in March. One of the few men in the business that kept the artistic quality in his work without sacrificing his soul for the box office. Stanley, we'll miss you. And thanks for keeping your vision.
Image copyright Warner Bros.
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