Okay, here's the deal. I know you guys have to be completely up to the chin with all these TV shows being turned into movies. We've suffered miserably through The Beverly Hillbillies, we've begged for death during Wild Wild West, we've winced uncomfortably through McHale's Navy, and we've puked on our shoes throughout My Favorite Martian (okay, maybe that was just a stomach virus, but the movie was lame.) I still stand by my conviction that the only one of these shows that produced a worthwhile movie was The Brady Bunch, and that was because it refused to take itself seriously. I do love the fact that The Fugitive went from TV to film and now back to TV. May the circle be unbroken, by and by Lord, by and by....
And, no, people, we're hardly through with the trend. Supposedly, there's a Bewitched film in the works (I've heard Julia Roberts and Alicia Silverstone both mentioned here). There's talk of Gilligan's Island, I Spy, The Partridge Family, Three's Company, and, God forbid, Dallas. Can you imagine Dallas without the restrictions of television? Soft-core porn with cowboy hats. Yee-haw!
When I heard that Drew Barrymore was concocting a movie version of Charlie's Angels, I literally screamed. Drew, I thought, are you clinically INSANE?!? You finally have a good thing going again in Hollywood, with The Wedding Singer, Never Been Kissed and Ever After all kicking commercial butt as well as being decent movies. And you want to do WHAT?! But I calmed quickly, sure that nobody would take her up on this offer. No way. Nobody's that crazy. Then Columbia Pictures bought in on it. And Cameron Diaz hooked in. I thought, Cameron, honey, you're tee-teeing away everything you built off of There's Something About Mary and Being John Malkovich. And Bill Murray?!? Award-winning-star-of-Rushmore Bill Murray? So, honestly, I just quit listening to any of the hype about Charlie's Angels.
Until about a month ago, that is. When the media carpet bombing began. Every channel was Angel-happy. TV-Land jumped in with both feet, showing reruns of the original series. My blasted popcorn bag from the dodecaplex had Charlie's Angels ads on it! Then I caught the first commercial, and said to myself, "Self, that actually looks pretty cool." So I gave it another chance.
Man, am I glad I did. Charlie's Angels is a surprisingly good action flick, with more than a few hard laughs and plenty of inside jokes, and, oh, did I mention that the "new" Angels are pleasing to the eye too?
First things first. Forget Sabrina, Kelly, and Jill. This time around, the Angels are wild girl Dylan (Barrymore), klutzy dancer Natalie (Diaz), and the proper, well-educated Alex (Lucy Liu). These Angels are doing the "superhero" bit, hiding their crime-fighting careers from their loved ones, but it's no secret they're loving every minute of their job, and their "supervisor," Bosley (Bill Murray). This time out, Charlie (voiced as always by the unseen John Forsythe) needs his Angels to go on assignment to rescue a young telecommunications tycoon named Knox (Sam Rockwell), who's been kidnapped, presumably, by his business rival Roger Corwin (Tim Curry).
That's relly all there is to it, folks. There are some plot twists and a few surprises thrown in to keep you paying attention, but for the most part, the twists are really just sweeping curves, and the surprises are less that staggering. But, honestly, I gotta tell you folks, it doesn't matter. I know, I can hear you now: "IT DOESN"T MATTER?! Has Doc lost his screw-top?"
No fear, little ones, no fear. It doesn't matter because, quite frankly, the movie is too much of a loaded deck to go working in some Usual Suspects quadruple-cross storyline into it. And that's what makes this such a good movie. Unlike the Mission: Impossible mishmash of early Summer, Charlie's Angels has none of the ego factor building it into something it's not. It does not take itself so seriously that it forgets what the whole idea is -- having fun. These three girls look like they're having fun being undercover detectives/superspies because they are, indeed, having fun. Drew Barrymore, who also co-produced Angels, had the good sense to hire McG (also known as Joseph McGinty Mitchell) to direct. McG comes from a sharp music video background, and he knows how to play with the camera and the genre.
I grant you, this is no threat to replace Life is Beautiful or Schindler's List in the Great Artistic Merit Movie List. It's loud, it's fast, it's WAY over the top, and it stretches the preposterous to achingly new levels, but it does so with a tongue-in-cheek attitude that makes it hard to dislike. Every fight scene is martial-arts by way of The Matrix, with all involved ignoring basic rules like gravity and inertia. Just the fact that Crispin Glover plays a master martial artist should say something for the believability. But even he fits right into the formula.
The casting of Barrymore, Diaz, and Liu is a perfect fit, and adding Murray as Bosley only shapes things into perfection. Sam Rockwell is good, especially after his character becomes broader as the movie continues. Having Tom Greene and Matt LeBlanc cameo as Dylan and Alex's significant others was also a nice touch, as it keeps the TV mentality about it. Curry's great talents are a bit wasted, but, as always, he snags every scene he's in just by wiggling an eyebrow or showing that Rocky Horror smile.
Look, it's simple for me to sit here and say this is all just mindless action and fighting. I could say that, but I'd be lying. The difference is in the cast and in the method. These fight scenes remind you of some of John Woo's gravity-busting scenes, but watching beautiful women perform them in tight leather clothing has much more apeal to me than seeing Chow Yun Fat do the same thing in a black suit and patent-leather shoes. Plus, Woo presents his fight scenes with a sense of reverence and awe. I accept that, and enjoy it, but here, that sort of thing's abandoned for the sake of fun. You can accept Cameron Diaz jumping some 20 feet horizontally to kick Crispin Glover 12 times in the face before touching ground again when you know that, in real life, she'd be cementally challenged in six feet. You can accept it, that is, when you're sitting back, munching popcorn and Junior Mints, with a cheesy grin on your face.
Forget all the rumors you've heard about of the cast spats, or the Incredible Exploding Budget, or whatever else. No matter what you heard, it doesn't show up on screen. No, this is not going to be anywhere near the Beloved Podium come February, but not even Producer Drew expected to be. There is, however, more than one reason to see a Fall movie. Go see Charlie's Angels and go quick, because this may very well have started a trend -- throw in some good fun movies to water down the "artistic Oscar" season.
This one is a winner, may Farrah and Jaclyn and Kate forgive me. I'll always adore my generations' Angels, but this new generation's Angels are ten times more fun to watch. And, mercy -- the things they do to diving suits....
Image copyright Columbia Pictures.
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